Play It Green

“I lay so still against the tree branch I was just the same everything as the tree. I was like a green mamba snake. Poison. I could be right next to you and you wouldn’t ever know it.” –Ruth May, from Barbara Kingsolver’s A Poisonwood Bible.

Here’s what I learned today: Kobe Bryant gave himself the nickname “the black mamba” after the deadly African snake. Probably everyone knows this already, but these are the little tidbits that lead to unexpected internet search journeys that make the whole business of blog-keeping worthwhile. No doubt the nickname made sense on a couple levels—the snake is “very aggressive when disturbed or confronted” and “will not hesitate to strike with deadly precision.” Were it not for the King Cobra, it would be the largest venomous snake in the world. It’s scary and it’s fast—the fastest snake in the world, capable of up to 12 miles per hour. All very obvious stuff, and completely defensible from an I’m-an-oversized-ego-athlete perspective.

But also, the Air Jordan XIX design was inspired by the black mamba after Jordan’s third and final retirement. The Zoom Kobe III sneakers released by Nike last year also come in a Black Mamba edition, black sneakers with diamond openings like snake scales, presumably. Here’s the not very effective motto: Slice through the lane like a snake on the hardwood. I get caught up on word choice—does a snake slice? How about slither? Slide? Swish? (Type “snake and slice” into Google and you end up with things like the “Silly Snake Sandwich”     ).

There’s even an entire website dedicated to Kobe Bryant’s footwear—www.kobebryantshoes.com—because some people spend a lot of time thinking about what Kobe wears on his feet.

And what does it all have to do with The Poisonwood Bible, right up there in the upper reaches of best books I’ve ever laid eyes on? Just this: the green mamba, the quiet star of that story, has venom just as deadly as the black mamba, but it’s smaller and not quite so aggressive. This is the nickname for the un-Kobe, the subtle player, laying low, striking only when necessary, but still deadly. And the green mamba’s a lot cooler looking (the black mamba, despite its name, is not actually black) and would make for one hell of a striking sneaker design. You’re welcome, Nike (and future “green mamba”).

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Because we need fun receptacles to prevent us from throwing our bottles and cans in with the regular trash…enter the Fan Can. Nothing will make you want to recycle at a game like a can that’s all dressed up in your team colors with a festive helmet/baseball cap to boot! There are more than 100 of these cans stationed around Nationals Park–thanks to Coca Cola sponsorship–and they come in baseball player, football player or motor sports driver shapes. The Maryland Company that produces the cans clearly has hit on a brilliant green marketing mashup. But I’d take it one step further–Fan Can robots! Removes that inconvenient walking to the Fan Can altogether.

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The May/June issue of E Magazine is out which includes one of my favorite green sports stories of the moment–the new Yankee stadium and how it ruined the Bronx. Not only has the more-than-one-billion stadium proved a PR nightmare for the team, with entire empty sections acting as de facto rejection of outrageous ticket hikes–and the team’s direction–but to build the sterile monolith they cut down over 25 acres of parkland in the Bronx. Geoffrey Croft of NYC Park Advocates wrote to comment on the story today and said not a single replacement park has yet been opened–and won’t likely be for another 6 to 9 months. What’s more, those new parks promise synthetic turf, not grass and the mature elms and oaks that provided the only tree coverage in that Bronx neighborhood–and the only combat to terrible air quality. One of the saddest effects to me of this lost natural space in the city–the idea of the Yankees destroying local little league fields to build their new stadium. 

Of course most of the other new stadiums–including the Mets Citi Field–have done it right. Minnesota’s new park will open next year and is angling for a LEED (Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design) gold rating, an impressive feat. The Washington Nationals’ new ballpark only got LEED silver status.  

And former Red Sox pitcher Bill “Spaceman” Lee has a few things to say about spoiled baseball players. “They’re afraid to walk down the street by themselves,” he said, explaining why they couldn’t be bothered with being environmental spokespeople.

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